The time has come to say goodbye

Earlier this year my husband applied for a new job. As usual, I encouraged him as he went through the interview process. It was a long, drawn out process, but he was finally offered the position. This new job is located in Austin Texas - meaning it is time for us to leave Japan.

After living in Tokyo for the past 5 years, I find myself flooded with conflicting emotions. I have loved so much of our time here. We have lived and experienced as much as we could. I will never look back on this time and say I wish we had done more. I have said more than once - if you are bored in Tokyo, it is your own fault. This city is had endless options to keep people's attention and interest. Yet, a part of me has always wanted to be back in the US. Living as an outsider is exhausting and being so far from loved ones is VERY challenging. Although I missed home pre-covid, it was nothing compared to the the past 3 years of isolation and distance.

As I reflect on our time here, I am most grateful to the people who embraced our family. From the park moms who took me into their group, to the neighbors who gave me the connection and friendship I desperately needed, to the helpful individuals that made life easier, to the work friends I encountered and cherished. Just thinking of all these special individuals has me tear up. There were so many times that I felt like I was at the end of my rope, only to find myself rescued by a kind person. There were the moms that gave me a listening ear and a reality check. There were the English-speaking parents at my kid's school who let me know what was going on when I didn't have a translator. There was the farming family that gave me hope, inspiration, and so many vegetables! The list goes on and on.

Our house is a flurry of activity today. The movers are here to pack away our memories, cherished possessions, and the tools of our life. I've spent weeks sorting what goes with us on the airplane, what is shipped with the movers (which takes 3 months, by the way), and what gets left behind (either with friends or the garbage gods). It is a stressful day, in part, because it is the end of an incredible chapter in our lives. So much of me is excited to see what is in store for us in Austin - a city I've never been to. But a huge part of me is sad to leave a place that is so incredibly special to me.

I have loved learning more about Japan. I've delved into the world of how to make traditional Japanese ingredients, like miso and ponzu, that will forever bless my table. I taken a stab at several traditional Japanese crafts, like sashiko, that were fun and amusing. Our family has thoroughly enjoyed attending events, like summer festivals, and exploring the area beyond the common known haunts.

We have explored and tried and seen and done so much here. It has been truly incredible. Of course, these past three years have been a lot of time spent at home. But, pre-COVID, we tried to cease all opportunities for having fun. From magical winter light displays to awesome summer fireworks to flower fields that captured our hearts to autumn-colors that made us stop in our tracks. We delighted in visiting shrines and temples. Devouring incredible food that were incredible for our eyes, noses, and mouths were taken to a new level. The views of both cityscapes and nature are incredible here. I am so glad to have this blog as a reminder of all the fun we've had (and even some of the not so fun parts).

I recognize that I am a different person than the person who arrived here 5 years ago. I have changed because my life experience has allowed me to grow in a way that I wouldn't have been able to if I stayed put in Seattle. Living in a foreign country has opened my eyes to so many things I was never aware of before. I'm still the hard-headed, opinionated, passionate woman I've always been. But now I have a different level of patience, tolerance, and understanding. (Of course these are not always obvious, as those levels are not infinite amounts!). I even feel like I understand my husband a little bit better because I have seen his homeland in a way much more familiar that just a visit here and there.

No one really knows what the future holds. I hope it will consist of many more adventures and experiences that bond us as a family and make us stronger individuals. May our future be filled with lots more laughter and really good food and friends that make our worst days seem bearable, no matter where we are in the world.

A real dish

My husband rarely agrees to get dinner delivered. Pretty much anytime I bring up getting something delivered, he offers to cook instead or we just go out. But the other night it was raining, and we had spent the day in our pajamas, and I didn’t have anything planned, and…. Well, I just wanted to order delivery!

After a short debate, he finally relented and agreed to order from a family owned Chinese place we have been meaning to check out, but have never gotten around to actually visiting. We just happened to have a menu in the stack of never used delivery menus and coupons. So he called and ordered a few of our family’s preferred dishes to be brought to our door.

Less than a half an hour later, our doorbell rang, announcing the food had arrived. My husband immediately jumped up and alerted the delivery person we were coming using the video doorbell system. Then he asked for me to give him a hand. I looked at him quizzically, but followed to help get everything from the door to the dining table.

Behind the door was a delivery person holding a large metal box, called an okamochi. I’ve seen these boxes many times over the years, typically hanging on the back of a motorcycle with a stabilization system so the food doesn't shift. I knew they were used for food delivery. But I’ve never had one bring me any food. They slid the door to the box up, revealing the food inside, and began handing four plates to my husband.

My son has a miniature okamochi in his play food set.

As my husband passed the first two plates over to me, I exclaimed “These are REAL dishes!”

My husband turned and looked at me like I was an idiot. As eloquently as he could muster, he replied “Duh.”

“But what do we do with the dishes?” was my next question.

“We leave them by the door and someone comes to pick them up later.”

Talk about service!!! I have never, ever, heard of such a thing!

I continued to fuss as he paid for our food (cash, of course) and thanked the delivery person for his service. Once settled at the table, he told me that getting delivery served on dishes was totally normal for him. When he was growing up, all restaurants delivered food on actual dishes. Only recently, specifically with Covid and the introduction of companies like UberEats, have take-out containers become more typical. But, for many small restaurants that have their own delivery people, delivery on real dishes is still the norm.

Dinner was absolutely delicious. We are so excited to find more yummy food in our neighborhood. And, hopefully, my husband will relent to my requests for delivery a bit more knowing this restaurant checks so many boxes for us.

After we ate, I rinsed the plates and put them outside our front door and they were gone before noon the next day - just like room service in a hotel.

Despite the fact that I constantly complain about the wastefulness in this country, there is a small league of traditionalists that don’t leave you with a pile of garbage after a meal - just four small pieces of plastic wrap that covered each plate. These people (and their businesses) have my full support, especially since it means that I’ll be supporting a second type of business that I like to give my money to - family owned, small businesses.

Working 9 to 5

Last year I went out and got myself a job. This definitely wasn't my first job! I've had many jobs throughout my life. I started, as many people do, working in retail to pay for my various wants and saving for a rainy day while in high school. In college, I worked a variety of jobs to pay the bills. Immediately after college, I taught English in Japan. Then I moved into the corporate world.

I worked for a huge company for 11 years. There were good parts and... challenging... aspects as I worked my way up the corporate ladder. I got to be part of a team and I learned a lot about myself and my potential. I was really good at my job (if I do say so myself) and I felt a level of satisfaction from my successes.

But, after I had my son, my priorities changed. Suddenly, I wasn't interested in "playing the game" anymore. I simply wanted to do my job and then rush home to spend as much time with my son as I could. Being a working mom is incredibly difficult! The balancing act is intense and never seems to even out.

Just a few days shy of my son's second birthday, I quit my job. I walked away from a regular paycheck, a regular schedule, and everything I had worked so hard to achieve (in the corporate world).

Over the past 6 years, I have rarely missed any part of working beyond the paycheck and the friends. I have had an incredibly wonderful time being a stay-at-home mom. Of course, it wasn't an easy profession either! The balancing act of working outside the home is extremely different than the balancing act of the stay-at-home parent, but it is still there and intense! I must say, I never had to deal with crying meltdowns on trains when I worked in an office.

In Japan, it is still the norm for women to leave their jobs when they have kids to stay at home at least until they start school. The percentage of stay-at-home parents that I personally know is much higher in Japan than it was in the US.

When my son started elementary school, COVID-19 had just arrived on the shores of Japan. We were officially in a pandemic. During the first 6 weeks, I homeschooled my son. Then, he headed into the classroom. And I was all alone. Well, my husband was upstairs working in the office we set up for him in our bedroom, but I'd only see small glimpses of him when he'd refill his tea cup or come down for lunch. My reality was me feeling more isolated than ever.

Since moving to Japan, I have often felt lonely. Between physical distance, language barriers, and what-have-you, it is really hard to form tight bonds when you live in a foreign country. Although I've always had my boys, they are definitely not girlfriends! Only seeing loved ones through a screen has been incredibly challenging for my heart and soul.

After a LOT of prompting from a friend, I applied for a job as a relief teacher at an international school (meaning: the classes are taught in English and use a European teaching philosophy). This way, I could be around other English speaking people (people who know what it is like living abroad), but still be master of my own schedule. I was worried that I wouldn't be hired because I had been out of the workforce for 6 years AND I sometimes needed to have a day off because I needed to be with my son. Even with all my "what ifs" and so forth, it didn't matter. They needed teachers and I needed something to do. In the end, my experience and enthusiasm earned me a position and I was quickly put to work.

Since starting, I have taught kids between kindergarten and eighth grade. I've helped kids with reading and math and art. I have met so many friendly faces and found a new source of joy. Whenever I leave a classroom, I am refueled in a way I haven't been in a very long time. I have reconnected with a side of me that I desperately missed, and didn't even know it. Being in this particular environment has been so important to my mental health.

I was recently explaining to someone that teaching is extremely selfish for me. All of my reasons for showing up are about me. I am there to be a part of the community. I teach because I like feeling like I am helping people. I gain so much by being a part of something where the sole purpose is encouraging others to succeed. In this particular sea of people, I feel like I belong and I am wanted. And more often than not, I get to spend my day hearing kids laugh and get excited about things.

For the longest time, I was really unsure about getting a new job. I had so many reasons to not do it. But in the end, it has been a really good thing.

It has been 2 years - Osaka, Kobe, Awaji (part 3 of 3)

Before heading off Awaji Island, we made a couple stops.

First we swung by an old favorite - Takosenbei no Sato. My husband and I have visited this senbei (cracker) factory every time we have visited this island! We love the crackers from here. Unfortunately they weren't making any crackers while we were there, but we still got to buy a ton to take home!

Next, we found a (new to us) shrine. Izanagi Shrine houses the two Gods, Izanagi-no-mikoto and Izanami-no-mikoto, that are connected with the formation of Japan. Folklore explains that Awaji Island was the first landmass created by the Gods. Two Gods came down from heaven and stirred the seas with a spear. When they lifted the spear out of the sea, drips fell from the tip and created the islands. Although the island is referred to as Onogoro in religious texts, scholars have declared Onogoro is Awaji Island.

Izanagi Shrine is the oldest shrine in Japan. People say it was built on the site where Izanagi and Izanami lived after becoming mortals. Shrine visitors pray for harmonious marriages and relationships as well as safe childbirth.

On the shrine grounds, there was a section of roof that allowed us to get an up close view of the fascinating thatched roofs commonly found on shrine buildings. They are meticulously assembled with small pieces of bark from Japanese cypress trees. Gifted professionals shape intricate designs into the peaks. The roofs last about 60 years and are fully replaced when needed (no patching). People rarely get an up close view of these, so I was appreciative of them putting it on display.

It was time for us to slowly head back to Osaka. But before we trekked all the way back, we made a pit stop to see Kobe's Chinatown. This locale holds a special place in my heart, as it is where my husband and I had our very first date. We tried to buy hum bow at his beloved Shi Koh Roh, but it was closed for a new year holiday! It was very upsetting as these are our favorite hum bow in the world! We refused to let it get us down and headed over to the main street of Chinatown to dine on street food from various vendors while regaling our son with tales of our first date.

All too soon, our short getaway came to an end. We returned the car and boarded the Shinkansen to head back to Tokyo. All was well, until suddenly an announcement came over the loudspeaker on the train. It was snowing in Tokyo and our train would be delayed getting into the station because it needed to slow down a bit due to the weather. With big eyes, my son tried to hold back his cheers. His wish for snow was coming to fruition! Snow in Tokyo!

It might have been a bit more hassle coming home in the snow, but we didn't mind one bit as it brought such joy to our son. It was a great way to end our trip, like the cherry on top of a sundae (or carrot on the snowman's face) that we waited 2 years to enjoy.

It has been 2 years - Osaka, Kobe, Awaji (part 2 of 3)

We woke early in order to enjoy breakfast in the hotel restaurant on the 12th floor. Eating our meal (which included several Osaka specialties like takoyaki) while enjoying the view of Osaka Castle was a great start to the day.

After a lovely breakfast, we drove to Kobe to Glicopia - the factory that makes Pocky and Pretz, two very famous snacks. My husband was able to get us reservations for the factory/museum tour. We learned a bit about the history of the company (which originated as a caramel company that added oyster concentrate into its confections for a little bit of nutrition) and saw the machines that make Pocky and Pretz. We also got the make virtual snacks in their virtual bakery. I did see a kitchen that I assume is currently closed due to Covid, but might otherwise offer classes to make your own treats.

I've been to the Glico factory before. Even though the tours are all in Japanese, it is fun to see everything. The signs above the factory viewing windows have English, allowing me to learn about what various machines do.

For lunch, we decided to enjoy an Akashi region treat called Akashiyaki. It looks like takoyaki, and even contains octopus, but is definitely a different dish. Using a batter made of eggs, flour, starch, and dashi stock, the balls are cooked in the same pan as takoyaki with a chunk of octopus in each one. The balls are light and fluffy, with a very soft, but fully cooked, center. It is served on a wooden platform and either dipped in a dashi broth or with a dab of sauce (similar to a bbq sauce). Akashiyaki is very tender, and we ripped more than one with our chopsticks. The advantage to this is letting out some of the steam, as they are served very hot. The simple dish is delectable. My whole family enjoyed it.

All too soon, we were back on the road, heading across the longest suspension bridge in the world. Akashi Kaikyo Bridge spans 1,991 meters (6,532.2 feet). It is a beautiful bridge taking people from Kobe to Awaji Island (called Awajishima). Shortly after arriving on the island, there is a rest stop (called a Highway Oasis) that is perfect for photographs. Japanese rest stops are amazing little places with restaurants, shopping, and CLEAN bathrooms.

Up next on the agenda was a fukimodoshi or party noisemaker factory! This fun stop had us making our own noisemakers. These fun devices are 90% made by hand - even in the factory. So, it was a lot of fun assembling them ourselves. After paying a small fee (400 for children and 800 for adults), we chose the materials to make 6 noisemakers each. After curling the paper and attaching it to the mouthpiece, we went outside where we tested one of our wares and were even taught a couple tricks.

Since we had time, we swung by the Hanshin-Awaji earthquake museum. This museum focuses on what happened during the January 17, 1995 earthquake that rocked the island, Kobe, and surrounding areas resulting in the deaths of over 5,000 people. Our son was quite shocked to see the real examples of shifted earth and structures resulting from the earthquake. While this isn't a "must see" on many people's list of things to do, I do think it is important to understand what an earthquake can do when residing in an area where earthquakes are commonplace. (And let me tell you, they happen ALL THE TIME here!)

Finally, we headed to my husband's family's timeshare on the island. We bathed in the onsen and enjoyed an incredible dinner.

Then, we called it goodnight because we were all exhausted.


To be continued...

It has been 2 years - Osaka, Kobe, Awaji (part 1 of 3)

Ever since a trip to Nara and Osaka in January 2020, our family has decided to hold off returning to Osaka due to rising concerns about Covid. It has been a difficult decision, but one that we have felt was best for our family. We have missed it dearly.

Since Tokyo's Covid numbers have been in the single and double digits since October, we decided it was safe to go for a visit. We talked about what our tolerance was, and finally decided that we would ride the Shinkansen from Tokyo to Osaka, but rent a car to drive around Osaka. This was the first time since moving here that we have rented a car in Osaka, allowing us to go much further in our exploration than on previous trips.

The Shinkansen was peaceful. We passed through a bit of snow in the Nagoya region, which made our son very envious. He has been wanting it to snow in Tokyo, but the weather has not granted his wish. The car rental place was located right at Shin-Osaka station, which made for a very easy transfer.

We first drove to the family cemetery, where we paid respects to my husband's family. It is a very important part of Japanese culture to pay respects tho those that have passed. While at the cemetery, we wash the headstone, place fresh flowers in vases built into the headstone, light candles and incense, as well as say prayers. Since several family members are entombed within one headstone, the honoring of those passed is done all at once.

We then drove to our beloved Miwa Jinja, our favorite shrine in Japan.

We wrapped up the day with a family dinner with relatives we have not seen for a very long time.

We stayed at an amazing hotel overlooking Osaka Castle. Although we were there to only sleep and eat breakfast, it was a wonderful experience as Osaka Castle is an amazing site to behold. We decided that the only way to improve our experience there would be to go when the cherry or plum trees are blooming, as the gardens surrounding the castle are filled with blossoms at that time.

To be continued...

All I want for Christmas

I doubt it comes as any surprise, but all I want for Christmas is… family and friends and good cheer! As the big day draws near, I am working hard to make it the best Christmas in Japan yet.

I still have to remind myself every year that Christmas is not a holiday in Japan. It is simply a fun commercial experience that many people have bought into. I was overjoyed when I realized that this would be the first year since moving here that my husband and son would be home all day for Christmas! No work and no school!!! I can’t wait to have my boys all day as we open presents, eat a wonderful meal, and make it as joyful as we can.

A couple of weeks ago, I was asked to teach a cooking lesson to a small group of moms from my son’s school. They wanted to learn what American’s actually eat on Christmas (some people still think everyone in the US eats fried chicken from KFC). I decided to teach them to make dressing (as I never stuff a turkey) and fudge. One of the moms offered her kitchen and another mom helped me shop for ingredients. This past Tuesday, we all gathered for a lesson and lunch. It was so fun teaching these moms how to make foods that represent the holiday for me. Beyond the dressing and fudge, I brined chicken breasts and pre-made cranberry sauce. This, combined with a salad, served as our lunch. While eating, we talked about Christmas traditions and how it is celebrated differently in the two countries. I went home with such a full heart. It was an incredible blessing to be able to share with these ladies.

Little did I know, the real warm fuzzies would come today. Starting first thing this morning, I started receiving texts as the moms started the process of recreating the meal for their families. I was overcome with holiday cheer as a teacher and as a fellow mom, knowing that they were sharing their new knowledge and it was blessing their tables.

Whenever I have felt exceptionally distanced this holiday season, little things have been gifted to me to bring me cheer. It is almost like little Christmas elves at work. Dark nights were combated with incredible illuminations (holiday light displays). Grumpiness over having to listen to 800 versions of “Last Christmas” and “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” (songs that I detest) was irradiated when my husband made me a Christmas play list that only contains my favorite holiday tunes. And an isolated feeling will be demolished when some friends join us tomorrow for Christmas dinner.

As a special treat, my husband ordered a turkey on Amazon for us to enjoy on Christmas Day! It arrived 2 days ago, frozen solid. We debated for a long time about what size to get - our oven is about the size of a microwave! Despite knowing it was going to be a small bird, I still laughed out loud when I pulled the 6.5 pound bird out of the box. I swear I’ve cooked chickens that were bigger! But it doesn’t matter. I still, for the very first time, get to have turkey and turkey soup and turkey sandwiches!!! That, in itself, has brought me so much Christmas cheer. Getting to share it with another family will make it that much better.

While Christmas here will never be anything like Christmas with my extended family back in the US, it is nice to embrace it as our own and celebrate as much as we can.

Adventures with medical care

A while ago I started having difficulty swallowing. I ignored it for a very long time because I simply didn’t want to go to the doctor. It is such a frustrating process for me as I seem to run into a lot of language barriers and different expectations of care.

A friend finally convinced me it was time to go. I swallowed my pride and had my husband seek out an English speaking doctor.

He actually found one not too far from our house. I went by myself, hoping for a quick consult and a simple solution. Instead of what I wanted, he gave me a referral as well as an unexpected opinion on my lack of Japanese skills. (It is so interesting how people like to give opinions here for things that are really none of their business.) Despite his critical comment, he took quite a bit of time to ensure the doctor he was referring me to could speak English.

A few days later, I was headed to the hospital to see the specialist. To an American, heading to the hospital is sounds pretty unnerving, but here it is more like going to a clinic with a whole bunch of departments. Shortly before my appointment, my husband informed me he was going to come with me to my appointment. I was grateful to have him join me to help with all the paperwork I knew I would need to fill out.

The morning of my appointment was a whirlwind of paperwork and waiting. Lots and lots of waiting! When we were finally called back, we were greeted by a different doctor than the one I was referred to. I softly asked “can we talk in English?” The doctor replied “I can understand everything you are saying, but I don’t have the confidence to speak to you in English.” At that point I was very, very grateful to have my husband, aka my translator, along for the appointment.

The doctor decided that my issue required a bit more investigation and we scheduled another appointment.

Last Saturday my day finally arrived. Since my husband was once again accompanying me, I needed someone to watch our son. Luckily, our beloved neighbor was free and more than willing to spend a few hours with him. She arrived with a bag of fun to keep them occupied while we were gone - including a gingerbread house! My son was over the moon.

The comfort I felt, knowing he was with someone I trusted, was pretty overwhelming. Since he was in trusted hands, I was able to relax for my appointment and focus on my medical care.

The appointment went smoothly (weirdly all in English), revealing there was nothing to be concerned about.

Throughout the whole process, I kept thinking how up a creek I’d be without my lovely husband as well as the support of friends. They keep me going, encourage me, translate for me, and even watch my kid at times. I’m so grateful for everything they do for me.

A whole lot of cabbage

As the cold weather takes hold, I am eager to eat all the comfort foods of fall. Images of warms bowls of soup, thick hearty stews, and filling casseroles delight my mind and make me hungry.

Earlier this fall my husband entered a lottery to win the chance to go to a local farm and harvest vegetables. Our family was blessed with this opportunity this year. Unfortunately, our son happened to have school on the same Saturday, so it was just the eager adults attending.

The weather was chilly, but sunny, encouraging us to bundle up for our bike ride over to the “farm”. (I use quotation marks because it is so small, I have a hard time using the term. But it is his business, so it is the correct term.) We arrived a few minutes before 9 am.

We lined up to hear the farmer and city employees give us a few instructions as well as inform us how lucky we were, since we had a 1 in 8 chance of being selected. We would be able to take home 3 carrots, 2 daikon (long radish), and 1 napa cabbage.

We started with the carrots, pulling 3 big ones easily out of the dirt. Then we walked over to the cabbage patch, where the farmer chopped the biggest napa cabbage off its root that I’ve ever seen. Finally, my husband pulled 2 enormous daikon from the ground.

My husband and I quickly started discussing what we cook with these gigantic vegetables. We quickly decided we needed to make nabe (soup) with, at least, part of the cabbage. There is a popular nabe known as mille-feuille nabe. The cabbage is layered with thin slices of pork, looking very similar to the famous dessert with the same name.

That evening my son was eager to help his dad with preparing the soup pot. They worked quickly to stack everything and create a beautiful flower design. My husband added a simple broth, and turned on the stove to let it cook. He also simmered some daikon in a different broth as a side dish.

Soon, dinner was on the table and we were all enjoying the nabe. We all agreed that dinner was delicious and we would happily eat it again and again. It is a great meal to warm us up through and through - and so easy to make!

*************

Mille-Feuille Nabe
Serves 3-4

1 napa cabbage (about 6 lbs/2.7 kg)
1 1/2 lb/750g sliced pork belly
5 cups dash (Japanese soup stock)
2 tbsp sake

2 tbsp mirin
1 tbsp soy sauce
Optional - ponzu for dipping

1. Cut the napa cabbage to the desired height - 2 to 2 1/2 inches or 5 to 6 cm.
2. Place each slice of pork belly between the napa leaves. If the pork is too long, you can trim to the desired length and use the excess in another layer.
3. Start packing the layers of napa cabbage/pork belly from the outer edges of the nabe pot (or whatever pot you are using). Work your way toward the center. The layers should be packed tightly as they will become loose as it cooks.
4. Work until the entire pot is filled. If you run out of napa/pork, you can put other ingredients in the center, like enoki mushrooms or mizuna (a bitter green).
5. Combine the dash, sake, and soy sauce. Pour it in the pot. Start cooking on high heat until boiling. Skim any foam. Then reduce the heat to medium low and simmer for about 10 minutes until the napa is tender and the pork is fully cooked.
6. Serve hot by itself or dip into ponzu.

A little this and that

I’ve had a couple pokes and prods to get back to writing. I didn’t really intend on taking a break. But, suddenly I realized it had been almost two months since I last checked in. Life has been continuing to pass day by day. The autumn leaves are finally out, which always delights me.

At this point with COVID, we are still avoiding big crowds and rarely take mass transit. Therefore, we are still spending lots of time at home and only traveling to places within biking distance.

This past week, my son had a day off of school (recognizing Labor Thanksgiving Day or Kinro Kansha no Hi, which has nothing to do with turkeys and everything to do with giving thanks for labor and production), giving us a chance to go check out the colors of the season at Heirinji Temple. The day included a long bike ride, a few brightly colored trees, carrot udon noodles, and lots of laughs.

We have rented a car a few times to get away for a day or night. These trips have been sanity savers on so many levels.

At the end of October, we rented a car and drove to Kawaguchiko. We made a pit stop along the way to visit our friends at Kasamatsu Farms. We had never met face-to-face, but formed such a connection over the past year and a half that we took the chance while we had it. It was quite dramatic getting there between a delayed rental car, horrendous traffic, and a kid suffering from horrible car sickness; but we eventually made it. Our visit was short, yet heartwarming as we immediately confirmed our friendship. This family business has not only supplied our tables with amazing vegetables, but also provided a lifeline of sanity, knowing that not everyone in Japan wants to triple wrap every item in plastic and sustainable practices are achievable here. At some point, I really hope to go back again and get my hands dirty!

After our visit, we finished our trek and explored the Kawaguchiko area. We went to a magnetic train demo museum, hiked up a hill to see a famous view of Mount Fuji (only to discover the viewing area was under construction!), and took our son to experience a ninja school (Oshino Ninja Village). While the activities were fun, the real treat were the amazing views of Mount Fuji. We could not have had better timing, as the mountain was not hindered by clouds the entire time we were there. We would gasp in delight every time we had a new view. The trip was one of the most revitalizing experiences we’ve had in a very long time.

The sunrise view from our hotel room!

While out and about in Tokyo recently, I was introduced to an old co-worker of my husband’s. She was super fun to meet and we clicked right away. At one point in our conversation, she asked me if I liked living in Japan. My husband and I both laughed. I can honestly say that right now I don’t enjoy living in Japan. I feel more isolated that I have ever felt in my life and the challenges of living in a foreign country feel extremely magnified. For the past two years I find myself being excessively irritated by things that would normally roll off my shoulders and my general enthusiasm has tanked. I find myself not wanting to talk or communicate with people because my list of angst far outweighs my joys. I don’t like feeling this way, but it is my current truth. Without my American breaks (visiting friends and family in the US), I am struggling. I increasingly find it hard to cope.

My frankness evolved into an interesting discussion about life, basic needs, and our desires.

At home, not much is going on. We get through each day as best we can. My son goes to school and studies tons of kanji as well as his multiplication tables. My husband works from a desk in our bedroom, peaking his head out for tea and random chats. I spend my days reading, watching too much tv, tending to our house, and getting out periodically for groceries, friends, and volunteering. Earlier this week, I was able to buy 30 organic yuzu (which is really hard to find) and I made ponzu and yuzu honey.

Uninspired

I have not been wanting to write lately. I wouldn't say I have writer's block. I would declare I am uninspired.

Feeling burdened with covid, state of emergencies (which has just been extended - again), and claustrophobia, does not foster the desire to write.

Last week was super hard. My son returned to school. I got my second covid vaccine. It was my dad's birthday. It was a lot to deal with.

My second vaccine was administered at a vacant school.
It was a little strange to get an injection in a school gym.

No side effects other than a REALLY sore arm for a couple days.

It seems like it would be a good idea to write about the overwhelming emotions that I've been feeling. But, honestly, I'm so tired of writing the same thing again and again. I don't have any new ways to say "this pandemic sucks and I am really sick of it!"

When I do leave the house, I am doing the same things that I've written about in the past. I am not exploring Japan like I have in the past and I rarely meet people or have interesting exchanges.

I'm not depressed. I am doing things I enjoy like sashiko and other sewing projects. I recently started a sourdough started, which I'm very excited to play with once it matures (I can't wait to make sourdough banana bread - it's so good). The weather isn't insanely hot, which also makes things much more tolerable in so many ways.

I am, however, simply existing. I'm waiting for something interesting to come along. And while I wait, the keyboard isn't a huge draw.

Four years later

The other night, I tried in vain to fall asleep. Instead of peacefully drifting off into dreamland, I laid in bed with random thoughts running through my head. From global warming to my son returning to school in just a few days, my mind was full of unease. I tried counting from 100 to 1, but sleep remained elusive. Just when I thought I had experienced the full range of random thoughts, I realized that we were about to pass the 4th anniversary of arriving in Japan.

Soon, instead of counting numbers, I was counting experiences we have amassed over the past 4 years. Of course, our first 2.5 years were filled with activities, while the past year and a half we've mostly stuck close to home. I'm so glad I have kept this blog as a record of our many activities, because I know I have forgotten many of them!

Beyond the individual experiences we have had, I focused on how we have changed over the past 4 years. Our son has spent almost half his life here, as we moved here when he was newly 4 years old. It is so easy to see the differences in children as the years are much more apparent. He went from a young explorer to an eager scholar, as he completed kindergarten and went on to elementary school.

Just today, our son completed a rite of passage that is customary in Japan. He went on a family errand all by himself. He took our lunch orders, walked to a nearby take-out restaurant, purchased our afternoon meal, and brought it all home - all by himself! I tried not to be nervous, as this is not a task for an 8 year old in the US, but he proved he was ready and able when he completed the task with ease.

It is a bit harder to see the changes in my husband and me, but they are there. They are more internal in nature.

To celebrate this anniversary, we enjoyed some sparklers in the garden. We love senko-hanabi, a traditional Japanese sparkler that are small and simple, but beautiful to watch. My husband did these a lot when he was a child. You have to hold the sparkler very still (and can't do them on windy days) to get the full benefit of the sparkler. As soon as the lit tip falls off the fragile stem, the experience is over. But if the stars align, it provides a beautiful show.

Two kinds of senko-hanabi - Osaka (black tips) and Tokyo (colorful sticks).

I eventually fell asleep the other night with dreams of things that we still have yet to experience in this country, giving me something to look forward to. Each day we continue to hold onto this adventure of living in Japan, trying to get the full benefit of our experience. Just like with the senko-hanabi, we pray we are able to get the most out of our life here and appreciate the beauty along the way.

Big blue

On the rare occasion we rent a car, we try to fill our day with fun things. Desperate for a Costco run, my husband relented and rented a car. Unfortunately, this time, the weather wasn't going to cooperate for a fun day with outside adventures. But we weren't going to be deterred.

We decided to start our day with a quick stop at a blueberry farm for u-pick berries. At this particular farm, customers could pick if they wanted to nibble their way through the field or snack and pick to take home. Since getting to take any berries home from a u-pick is a rarity, I was excited to choose the latter. We can never have enough blueberries at home!

Lucky for us, it was only sprinkling when we arrived at the farm. We donned our ponchos and began to pick. I love farms that have a variety of berries, so we can find the type that we most enjoy.

Most blueberry fields I have seen in Japan, reside within a huge netting "cage". While it isn't very attractive, I would guess they don't loose huge crops to birds.

We picked an extra kilo (2.2 lbs) of berries to take home with us. My son was super excited, as he loves to have berries as snacks as well as with breakfast. I love to nibble on them, but also to cook with them! This time, I decided to make some jam with some of the berries (I also had some in the freezer, because I didn't want to use all the fresh berries for the jam).

I found a lovely recipe on foodinjars.com for cranberry-blueberry jam that doesn't use pectin. It is a very simple jam to make. I happened to have some leftover cranberries in the freezer from the holidays. Cranberries are not a common ingredient in Japan, so I was super happy to have these!

I was overjoyed to make the jam. Now my family has a couple jars, and I was able to gift a couple jars to the neighbors!