While drinking our tea, the doorbell rang. It's always a bit surprising when our doorbell rings and it isn't the Amazon delivery person. Since we weren't expecting a package, we all looked around at each other in surprise.
I was not dressed and didn't want to go near the door, so I sent my husband to answer it. We could see from our little video screen that there were two people waiting for an answer. We sometimes have Jehovah Witnesses or co-op employees come to our door to share their goods or offer their services, but they don't usually come on Sundays.
I could hear mumbling at the door, but wasn't really listening because I was occupied with our guest and son. Suddenly, my husband burst through the door that separates the entryway from the living room. He said "You have to come right now!" I vehemently shook my head no because I was not dressed at all. I was wearing a t-shirt and sweats, as well as a crown of crazy bed head. He insisted "Come on! Come on! You won't regret this!"
He took my hand and led me to the entryway where the two strangers stood. My husband started the introductions as the woman who was standing just behind the man stepped forward. "These are our new neighbors!"
In shock, I raised my hand to shake the extended hand of the woman - something you don't typically do in Japan. I started to apologize for my attire when she chipped in "Oh, you're dressed by North American standards!" Our new neighbor is a Canadian!
At that moment, I felt tears in my eyes. I was so overwhelmed by seeing this woman and knowing that she would be next door. She is someone I can talk to in English and was raised in a very similar culture to my own. It was very emotional for me.
It may seem strange to cry at the sight of a new neighbor, but the truth is, despite having a group of friends I am very lonely. It is hard to constantly have to explain and restrain yourself in interactions. I grew up being free to speak my mind, but living in a different culture, I must always think about if the other person will understand my reference, need a long explanation, or even think I am insane. Interactions that are supposed to be relaxed and fun can be extremely taxing. Sometimes, I just keep quiet and avoid interacting with people. But then, I find myself to be extremely lonely. It is a vicious cycle.
Growing up I did not understand why the immigrant kids in school typically only hung out with other kids from the same country they came from. They always seemed like such a clique and it annoyed me a bit. But now, as an immigrant myself, I finally understand their need to have friends that have a certain cultural understanding of one another that goes without explanation. It doesn't mean that we don't relish our new friendships with the people from our new home. It is more of a comfort layer that gives us energy and community that is desperately needed when everything in our life is a little extra challenging or different.
I don't know much about my new neighbor yet, or her Japanese husband - only the basics they were able to share during their introduction and quick Q&A. Unfortunately, they needed to continue to deliver their move in announcement gifts. The joy of their arrival has remained with me all day. I am looking forward to a coffee date with my new neighbor after they get a bit settled. I really hope we will be fast friends.
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