So much of life cannot be accomplished by a single person. The saying "it takes a village" can have just about any ending.
When I was in my early 20's, I did not understand this sentiment whatsoever. I wanted to do everything myself and I really thought I could. But the older I got, I learned (sometimes the hard way) that working together is so much better.
In the US, I had a whole village of people that were there for each other. If a childcare issue arose, I had several friends that were happy to help. If I had a house maintenance emergency, I had a neighbor that could always lend a hand or guide me to the right place to find a professional. If I experienced an "all systems failure," my parents would come to help me clean up the pieces. It took me years to figure out who my circle was - how I could support them and how they felt comfortable supporting me.
One thing that I didn't consider before moving to Japan was being without my carefully crafted community. It is not just the friendships I miss, but the supportive village. When one needs a helping hand, someone is there to lend it.
Pretty soon after moving here, I met the park moms. They helped me in so many ways - from helping care for my child to teaching me the ropes of where to go shopping and even helping me through a back injury. They have been incredible. I am always grateful for them.
Over time, I have slowly built up a community. Today a friend came over who takes care of my plants and grabs my mail anytime we go on vacation. It seems like such a little thing, but I really appreciate her efforts and dedication. We were chatting when I suddenly realized, through a lot of hard work and many chance meetings, I had created a new village. I am surrounded by super helpful people that bless my life in so many ways.
Of course, I hope they feel that I am just as helpful and important in their life as I feel they are in mine. I don't think this challenge is only an issue in Japan. Any time someone moves, they have to rebuild their circle. And it takes time. A whole lot of time.
In 2017 my family headed to Tokyo. My husband had a new job and my son and I came along for the ride. This move was my second move to Japan - the first was for a year in 2002. At that time I was a single, recent college graduate. Moving abroad as a family was a whole different ball of wax. As I live this crazy life in Japan, I track our adventures and my observations, creating an unofficial guidebook to the city.
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