A short break

I am busy packing and preparing.  Tomorrow I am going to the US for a visit.  This trip, as with most things, comes with mixed emotions.  I am ecstatic to go and see my loved ones.  I have been trying to not get too excited, but their hugs are within arms reach now.  Avoiding elation is futile.

My mixed emotions have to do with time.  It is going to be hard to have limited time with each and every loved one.  Even though we will be there for two weeks, there are so many people to see and spend time with.  There is never enough time to spend with loved ones.

I have been scheduling time with people and organizing gatherings in order to see as many people as possible.  It is excruciating to see that the time we have doesn't allot for enough time for sitting around, drinking tea, and laughing about whatever comes to mind.  Our visits will be almost timed in order to fit as many people in as possible. 

While this isn't a complaint, per se, it is troubling.  I don't want anyone to feel left out or neglected.  I know that all my friends understand, but it is still hard to soothe my conscience.  It is a lifelong battle beating myself up over something that is in my head and probably not in other people's heads.

While not obsessing over how much time I get to spend with people, I am thinking about food and what I want to buy to bring back to Japan.  I can't wait to eat Mexican, Greek, and American food.  Brunch is high on my list of foods that I miss. 

I have built a list of things to buy while stateside.  Over the past six months, whenever I would have a realization that I was lacking something that was helpful, appreciated, or missed that I thought I could import, it went on the list.  While some people have lovingly (and a great expense) mailed me some of these items, there is still lots on the list - much to my husband's chagrin. 

While I am in the states, I will not be updating my blog.  So, it really will be a break and I'll have a bit more time with my loved ones.