Today started like many of our days here in Japan. My son wanted to get out of bed at 5:30 and I begged him for an hour and a half to let me sleep longer. Finally, I got out of bed and gave him breakfast. My husband got ready for work and played with our son for a bit. At 9:00, my husband headed our the door and we soon followed. While on the subway, my son asked for a snack. I gave him 2 options and he didn't want either one. Whining ensued, but I did not relent. He decided to not have a snack.
We found our beloved Sunshine Aquarium and entered. I let him decide if we were going to go inside or outside. He chose inside. We wandered around for a bit and found ourselves at the big tank right as they were starting a diver "performance." We sat and watched as the diver fed the rays and fish.
After the diver, we went and saw the cape penguins being fed.
We then saw the seal show - my son's favorite.
Once that wrapped up, my son wanted to go inside again. No problem. Then he wanted a snack. I gave him two options, but he didn't want either of those. He wanted to eat at the café in the aquarium. I explained that we weren't going to eat there. That's when it happened. Crying. Screaming. A tantrum.
Even though it happens to all of us, it's still embarrassing. It's still frustrating. I feel all the eyes on me as the other patrons wonder how we got to this point and what I'm going to do about it. There's even a group of school children looking at him like "What his problem?"
I start with a deep breath and I tell him that we are going to have to leave if he can't get himself under control. It doesn't change anything. Keeping my voice calm, I tell him that I am going to help him leave the aquarium. I pick him up and take him, screaming and kicking toward the door. We walk out of the indoor area to fresh air. He begs to be put down and I explain that I can't do that until he is calm. He quickly quiets down knowing that I am serious.
If we were in the US, I don't think this meltdown would have bothered me as much as it did today. But I feel so much extra pressure here. When in another country, people are looking at you as the example of your home country's stereotypical behavior. Americans are known worldwide for the actions of a select few. I try to not make scenes. I try to set a good example and display a positive image. I didn't want to attract extra attention because I felt like I was showing a crowd of Japanese families how an American acts when their kid throws a fit. At that moment, I felt like I was under a microscope (even if that really wasn't the case) and I didn't want to be. I simply wanted to take care of my child's needs without giving in to the tantrum.
After a short, calm conversation, I decided it was time to leave and go get lunch. Low blood sugar is often a cause for big emotions. I hear my son inherited this from his mother. I say "Who? Me?" We find a place to eat and he's still testing limits, but at least he's no longer causing a scene. Once he has consumed his food, he's back to his normal self. I, on the other hand, remain a little frayed and in need of a nap.
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